


I’m longing to linger til dawn

by Catpal



Category: Dead To Me (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-04
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:22:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24534535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Catpal/pseuds/Catpal
Summary: Jen wakes up in the hospital after the car accident  fluff and maybe a tiny tiny bit of angst if you squint
Relationships: Judy Hale/Jen Harding
Comments: 10
Kudos: 112





	I’m longing to linger til dawn

**Author's Note:**

> Just what i imagine would happen when Jen woke up in the hospital. Slight canon divergence

As Jen slowly woke up, she felt a fog of confusion. The left side of her body was aching, a lot. Particularly her shoulder. Her mouth was really dry, and her head was throbbing. There were strange sounds around her that she couldn’t place, and she was lying in a bed that definitely wasn’t her own. She fought her way through the fog, and the events of the day slowly seeped back into her brain. She had been with Judy, her beautiful Judy, and they’d been smiling and laughing, happy for the first time in a long time. They were in a car, Charlie’s new car, his birthday present. And the stop sign! She’d won, she’d got her stop sign. And Judy had looked at her as though she’d hung the moon, instead of just petitioned for a stop sign, and it had filled Jen with a warmth and pride in herself that she’d never felt before. She’d known in that moment that she would spend the rest of her life trying to impress Judy, to make her proud, because the way the brunette had looked at her, had made her feel like maybe, one day, she could be worthy of the younger woman’s love. After the happiness though, the warmth, there had been shock, fear. A car had crashed into them. Jen felt her heart rate speed up, she’d been in an accident. Judy had been in the car, was she okay? She needed to wake up, she needed to open her eyes and ask someone if Judy was okay. Jen made one final push out of her fog, and opened her eyes, as her surroundings began to come into focus. She was in the hospital, that explained the bed that wasn’t her own, and the strange sounds all around her, as nurses bustled past her room talking loudly to one another, and machines whirred and beeped in the distance. Jen blinked hard to try and force her eyes to focus on the room around her, she could feel a weight on her right forearm, her good side, and she tried to make out what it was as the room slowly came into focus. 

“Judy? You’re okay?” She managed to rasp out, her heart soaring when she realised the weight on her arm was actually a human head, more specifically one of her three favourite heads in the whole world. 

The brunette snapped her head up from where she’d been resting it on her best friend’s arm, a huge smile broaching her features, the kind of smile that reached all the way to her eyes, the kind of smile that made Jen’s heart sing. 

“Oh thank god you’re awake. You’re okay. You’re okay right? Shit, sorry, your arm. I just... wanted to be close to you, and I was so tired so I just wanted to rest my head. I didn’t hurt you did I? I’m so sorry Jen, I’m so so sorry.” 

Tears had begun to swim in the younger woman’s eyes, threatening to spill over as she desperately searched the blonde’s face, as though trying to evaluate exactly how she was feeling in that moment. 

“I’m okay Judy, I really am. Don’t be sorry. I’m glad you’re here, I woke up and I was worried. I’m okay. We’re okay. Actually I’m really fucking thirsty.” 

The brunette immediately jumped up from her chair and made her way over to her best friend’s bedside, pouring a cup of water and then bringing the straw to Jen’s lips. 

“Here drink this.” Judy said gently, smiling warmly down at her. 

The action was so kind and caring, so very Judy. She was a caretaker, it was how she showed her love, and in that instant Jen was flooded with joy that she was someone Judy loved enough to want to take care of, but along with it came an overwhelming insecurity at being so vulnerable in front of someone. True, Judy has seen her at her absolute worst, and that was an understatement, but still the blonde felt a need to appear strong in front of her friend. She didn’t want Judy to think Jen needed anyone to take care of her because that was her job. To take care of herself. She couldn’t rely on anyone. So she did what she always did when she felt vulnerable. 

“I’m not a fucking invalid Judy, I can drink out of straw on my own.” She snapped, using her right arm to grab the cup from the younger woman. She immediately regretted her knee jerk reaction as the brunette flinched and automatically took a step back from the bed, a step away from Jen. 

Nice going Jennifer. Scare away the only person who sticks by you and trigger her PTSD at the same time. Real smooth. 

Jen immediately softened. 

“Oh my god Judy, I am a true asshole, I’m sorry,” she reached for Judy’s hand as fresh tears spilled from the younger woman’s eyes. “I need to stop lashing out at you. I’m going to stop that, I’m going to be better.” 

Judy took a step back towards the bed and started to open her mouth. 

“And don’t you dare say it’s okay Judy Hale. It’s not okay. It’s not okay when I do it and it wasn’t okay when Steve did it.” Jen leaned forward to cup the brunette’s face, in what she hoped would be a comforting gesture, and winced when pain shot through her entire left side. 

“I’m gonna go get a nurse, get you more pain meds. You dislocated your shoulder and you’re pretty bruised up. You have a concussion, they want you to stay overnight for observation.” 

“Have you been checked over? Are you okay?” Judy looked okay from what the blonde could see, but there was a bruise blossoming on her right cheek bone and seeing it caused a rage to bloom in the pit of her stomach she knew that if she ever found the fucking asshole who had hit them, she would make him pay for causing Judy to be in any kind of pain 

“I’m fine, honestly, just a few bruises and bumps. I’m going to go get a nurse for your pain and then I’m going to call Lorna and get her to drop the boys by for a quick visit, because you know Henry is not going to believe you’re okay until he sees it for himself.” Judy ran her hand soothingly up and down Jen’s arm and the blonde was overcome with emotion, it never ceased to amaze her just how well Judy had gotten to know and love the boys in such a short amount of time. She knew them as well, sometimes maybe even better than Jen did herself, and she would never take it for granted how lucky they all were to have Judy in their lives. 

“Are the boys staying at Lorna’s? They can just stay with you.” 

“No they can’t, because I’m staying here with you and I don’t think all three of us will fit comfortably in that hospital chair, especially since Char’s last growth spurt.” The brunette motioned towards a very uncomfortable looking chair, a playful smile on her face. 

“Jude, you don’t have to stay with me. I’m a big girl, I’ll be okay. You should sleep in an actual bed.” Even though Jen said the words, she didn’t feel much conviction behind them, because deep down, she selfishly never wanted the younger woman to leave her side. Especially not here in the hospital. Hospitals carried such bad memories for her. First, spending so much time in them as a kid when her Mom was sick, and then a couple of years ago, when she’d had her double mastectomy and subsequent reconstructions and had had no support from Ted. She’d spent some of the scariest, loneliest times of her life in hospitals just like this one, and the thought of doing it tonight was less than appealing, but she didn’t want to take advantage of Judy’s kindness, she wasn’t going to do that ever again. 

“Jen, I’m not leaving you here alone, are you kidding? Hospitals must carry such bad energy for you. I’m staying. And you’re not arguing.” The brunette sounded forceful, she all but stamped her foot, and the older woman was overcome with a wave of emotion. Judy got her, like really got her, in a way no one else ever had, and it was so overwhelming to be so truly seen and understood by someone. “I’m going to get the nurse to dope you up for the pain, and I’m going to give Lorna a call, I’ll be back soon.” Judy leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss on Jen’s forehead and quickly turned to exit the room. The older woman was glad for a moment of reprieve, her heart was so full in that moment she’d almost declared her love for the other woman right here and now in this hospital room. Hell, the spot where Judy had just placed the world’s most chaste kiss in the world, would not stop tingling, and there was a nervous feeling in her stomach like butterflies, but happy in love butterflies. She knew she shouldn’t feel this way, knew that she didn’t deserve to feel this amount of love for someone as kind and generous as Judy, but she just couldn’t make it go away. 

————————————  
Judy squirmed uncomfortably in her chair, hospitals really should consider how long people sat in their chairs. This thing was just about the most uncomfortable chair she’d ever tried to sleep in, and she’d lived out of a car on more than one occasion. The nurse earlier must have given Jen the really good stuff, because as soon as the boys had left her hospital room, she’d basically passed into a heavy state of unconsciousness. If she was honest, Judy had never seen the blonde woman look so at peace. She looked so serene and beautiful and Judy was glad that she was finally getting some rest after everything they’d both been through. The brunette quickly realised how creepy she was being, staring at her best friend while she was drugged up, did it make it less creepy to know that she was completely in love with the battered and bruised woman that lay in that hospital bed? She started to look determinedly away, just as she heard Jen muttering something, she whipped her head back and saw the blonde still had her eyes closed. Was she talking in her sleep? If so, was it an invasion of her privacy to try and hear what she was saying. She settled on trying to soothe Jen, and moved her chair closer so she could hold the older woman’s uninjured hand. 

“Shhh hon, it’s okay, I’m here.” She ran her hand soothing up and down her best friend’s forearm, not wanting to wake her but wanting to help chase away any demons that were dwelling in her drug hazed sleep. 

Jen’s eyes opened and closed sleepily, her eyes struggling to focus on Judy as she fought out from under the pain medication. 

“You’re so good to me. I wish I was good enough for you.” The blonde said so quietly that Judy wasn’t even sure she had heard it right. Jen was fighting sedation hard, like a toddler who refused to admit they were tired. 

“You are good enough for me Jen, you’re my person. I couldn’t do any of this without you.” Judy said, smoothing the hair out of Jen’s face and sending her one of her mega watt smiles, hoping to ease her best friend’s insecurity. She hated that Jen thought she wasn’t good enough. She was extraordinary, so strong and brave. She took charge in situations where Judy froze up with fear and she didn’t take shit from anybody. And her heart, she wouldn’t admit it, but Jen’s heart was so big, so full of love for the ones she adored, that Judy was often in awe of it. 

“Not good enough. I want you to love me like you loved that asshole Steve.” Jen slurred, now visibly starting to doze in and out, aided by the soothing nature of her best friend’s ministrations. “Because I love you. Like a lot. A lot a lot.” 

Judy was taken aback, was Jen admitting romantic feelings for her? Was this actually happening, or had she fallen into a coma induced by injuries from the car accident. Before she could rally her last two brain cells to come up with a response, Jen grabbed the front of Judy’s dress and pulled her closer, her voice a pantomime of a whisper, like a white girl after two too many vodka sodas. 

“I wanna see you naked.” 

Judy had to stifle a laugh at this comment, the absurdity of Jen’s drug fuelled confession almost, but not quite outweighed by the swooping feeling in her stomach at hearing the words she had longed to hear. 

“You can see me naked anytime you want, my love. But for now you need to rest, and we’ll see how you feel when you’re sober.” She leaned down and placed a kiss on Jen’s forehead. 

“Your face is sober.” Jen slurred as her eyelids finally lost their battle and shit heavily. 

Judy had to blink back tears as she settled back down in her chair, refusing to release Jen’s hand. She had just heard the words she had dreamed of hearing for a very long time, but how much did they mean coming from Jen in such a vulnerable state. Even as she tried not get her hopes up, she felt a giddy happiness rising within at the idea that the older woman felt the same way about her. Maybe she could finally have exactly what she had always dreamed of, the family she’d always craved and as she slowly drifted off to sleep imagining moving her things from the guest house to Jen’s bedroom, she knew that no matter what they were going to face in the future, as long as they had each other they were going to be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think, I usually just write super fluffy one shots so feeling a bit insecure about whether this is any good. If you like I have started a second chapter that will deal with how Jen feels when she wakes up sober the next morning :)


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